IAM A PRODUCT OF RAPE ( PART 2)

NB: You have to read part one first of this compelling story sent in by Gwen before reading part 2......

I had a darker skin than her and my brothers. That really got me thinking; who was my dad then. Whenever they came back you could see the joy on their faces as they had been spoilt with gifts and vacations to different countries during the holidays. He rarely came by the house.  Later in life I got to understand that he and mum were married for four years before they got divorced but they remained on good terms. I yearned to know who my dad was but I dared not ask mum because I would be shouted down. I went to a teacher and asked her why my skin was darker than my siblings and she explained to me that my father must be a black man and that I was bi- racial. At least that was a first step in knowing who my father was. Since I could not talk to mum about it I swore to find out about my dad when I was a little older. Little did I Know that the truth about my paternity was going to come out sooner than I had anticipated.
Mum had these group of female best friends who she went out with on some weekends. My mum was a great pretender; anytime these women came around the house; she was at her best behaviour; so they never really saw her calling me names. I always loved it when they came around to visit mum; they always complimented me on how I was gowing into a beautiful lady and you need to see mum smiling that fake smile from ear to ear.
One saturday; one of mum's best friends. Maria came to see mum and both of them went for grocery shopping. When they came back; I came outside to help bring in the groceries. As I was bringing out the bag with apples, the bag tore and all the apples fell on the floor. Mum forgot to pretend. She was livid. Any unprintable name she could remember she called me that day; worthless; lazy; good for nothing; ugly. Her friend; Maria after initially being shocked tried to stop her but she was having none of it; "You are as worthless as your father" she continued. I just quietly picked the apples from the floor put in the bag and carried to the kitchen while I still heard Maria reprimanding her for her choice of words. As I was coming back from the kitchen to carry more things from the car, that was when I heard Maria admonishing Mum that everybody everybody advised her to terminate the pregnancy and she said she would not do it; that it was against her religion as a catholic. She wondered why mum would take out the offence of a father on an innocent child. She should deal with the consequence of her decision. I leaned forward to hear more; what could my father have done. It was then my mum who was now sobbing said that she feels deep anger at being raped by a man she barely knew; someone she just met at the club and didnot even know his name and that the little she remembers of him that Iam growing to look like him and that brings a lot of resentment. Maria advised